Feminine is the vulnerability, the sensitivity and the gentle nurturing nature of a human. Feminist is the somewhat angry rebellion against control and manipulation of the above mentioned nature.
I have been both feminine and feminist. Zehra Nigah and Perveen Shakir have been the poetesses for the feminine. And many other writers and thinkers for the Feminist. To be protected should not mean being throttled. To be free should not mean to be excluded.
In the space between connection and autonomy (freedom), there is a bridge. This bridge is made of respect and humility. Without this we humans will barricade ourselves from each other, doomed to live fearful, separated, isolated, lonely lives. Without the distance that this bridge covers, we will live oppressed, hurt, unhappy, shamed, guilty and fearful lives of submission. Our boundaries are actually bridges that connect and yet keep us safe from each other. Because in every human there is a misery, a darkness that can hurt others. Our animal nature is never too far from our human endeavor to rise on our two feet and evolve into angels.
In the end, there is no ending, but a constant evolution. In the end, there is only a beginning, as life creates itself over and over again.
My story, your story is an intertwined thread in an ever evolving landscape of uncertainty. It is only compassion that persists in keeping the fabric of society and relationship together.
The Feminist Behind Her Barricade From Further Pain Cries Out:
To The Men I Loved and Still Do
If I were with you, I wouldn’t be able to be with me;
My love I wish you would stop making me become someone I am not
I wish you would stop seeing me as an object of your desire
I wish that I would stop seeing you as the enemy of my true self
I wish so many things, but in this life, I wish to be free;
Maybe we will meet again, in another life
When you and I have both figured out
That connection does not mean control
And freedom does not mean relief.
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And the Feminine seeks to find peace at the price of truth:
Mulayam Garam Samjhotay ki Chadar
Yeh Chadar Mein Ney Barson Mein Buni Hai
Kahen bhi sach key gul botay nahin hai
Kissi bhi jhoot ka taanka nahin hai
I have knitted my soft warm blanket
Of comprise over decades
Nowhere is there truth in its motifs
Nor is there even one stitch that lies
I will use it to cover my body
And you can be comfortable with it
You wont be happy, nor sad or regretful
When we spread it on the courtyard, it will bring the family together
In the evenings When we lift it, it will extinguish the lamp light
Issi sey main bhi tan dhak loon gi apna
Issi sey tum bhi assoda rahogay
Na khush hogay na, na pashmurda rahogay
Issi ko taan kar ban jaye ga ghar
bichha len gay to khil utthay ga aangan
Uttha len gay to gir jaye gi chilman
Zehra Nigah, the feminine poet
Behind The Veil 